I actually recently started doing grief work in real life - so I bumped an older posting back up to the top of the threads on something important to remember for our family and ourselves - grieving for what we have lost........maybe reading that will help you
I am now 100% free of TN pain. BUT I wear a secret invisible tatooo in my minds eye - that this can come back to bite me in the but before my second 50 years is done here on earth LOL
I will never be the old me - even without TN pain -- I have a tad bit of PTSD after only suffering months of it before MVD. Crazy-azz meds, no job, lots of depression, low self esteem.......all that is a very fresh memory still and I hope it just makes me a better person
I have had hundreds of other types of losses in my life, and will continue as time marches on, you lose friends, pets, neighbors, kids grow up, other health problems now move up the scale of importance that have been neglected -- not earth shattering - but loss of self is where I was my lowest -- not old or new self -- JUST SELF
I had no purpose - teen didnt need me - was not much use to wonderful newlywed hubby, no use to my profession, so I spent my time here mis-spelling on my drugs and trying to connect with others and learn all I could and support all I could - that was my daily existence besides my 5 pets at home therapy!
Now back to work and travel and killing off normal health issues like high BP and minor thyroid, and Menopause and sleep disorder and........ all took backseat to TN of course!
My hubby would often verbalize wanting the old kimberly back that was part of who I was in our 8 years of dating - I wasn't even my self on our wedding -- it has been a longggggggg road--- I've only been back to a new normal of myself for a few weeks and am so lucky that my TN struggle to date only lasted 18 months off and on.
I think we are all reinventing ourselves
and also read the featured posting on
The Spoon way up top of first message
Remember Anger Is Just Mis-Placed Fear!!!