My heart is breaking reading what you are having to deal with from somebody who you chose to be your life partner. To share moments of sadness, happiness, pain and life experiences with. Why would he think that you would lie to him about having this awful affliction? Beggars Belief! A fireman too; somebody who has chosen a profession where he saves others!! May sound like I'm beating up on somebody whom I've never met, but I'm just going off what I'm reading.
Please remember EVERY day that YOU are not pathetic or fragile. You have Trigeminal Neuralgia, which has re-written your story for a while. You will find a medication/treatment that will help you to be able to function and get through your days. I don't know what you do for a job, but there are many online options which you could look at if you are unable to leave your home. Please try to stay positive, I know some days it can seem impossible and post on here often as there are many many others who are going through the same thing.